Merit-bound Alley

The Age brings us some news that is some fucked-up concoction of funny, stupid, and sad. Seems like some Americans, fed up with the rising price of gasoline have begun prayer circles around the ol’ gas pump.

“Lord, come down in a mighty way and strengthen us so that we can bring down these high gas prices,” Twyman said to a chorus of “amens”.

“Prayer is the answer to every problem in life. We call on God to intervene in the lives of the selfish, greedy people who are keeping these prices high,” Twyman said on the forecourt of the petrol station in a neighbourhood of Washington that, like many of its residents, has seen better days.

“Lord, the prices at this pump have gone up since last week. We know that you are able, that you have all the power in the world,” he prayed, before former beauty queen Rashida Jolley led the group in a modified version of the spiritual, We Shall Overcome.

“We’ll have lower gas prices, we’ll have lower gas prices,” they sang.

In a time where there are wars going on, massacres in Darfur, tsunamis and earthquakes killing thousands, poverty, hunger, and disease, do these people really think that their god is going to prioritize their wallets while millions suffer needlessly? Isn’t this just the most arrogant and thoughtless thing you’ve ever heard?

I would like to hear some commentary on why this may not be supremely ignorant behavior, because for the life of me, I can’t get past it.

Okay, if the results of something that you try to do are equally attributable to chance as prayer, here’s how you can go about making sure all your endeavors are the most likely to succeed!

1. Instead of wasting your time on prayer, work your ass off for the desired result!

Wow! A one-step plan! You may not succeed, but at least you can’t blame god on the results! If you don’t pray for success, your mind is available to figure where you went wrong! And here’s the exciting part: if you can figure out where you went wrong, you can modify your behavior for an increased chance at success in the future!

Seriously, if you can’t rely on god to help you succeed (sometimes the answer is “No” or “Not yet”), then what’s the point if you can’t even figure out why god said no (god works in mysterious ways)? Your best bet is to forget prayer, and use that extra time to work harder for what you want. If god is that capricious, then you are more able to rely on your own hard work! It can’t fail!

Except that it can, but at least you can learn why if you don’t include god in the equation!

There was an interesting response to my post on Huckabee calling it quits. Of course, the comment called into question my statement that prayer does not work, so I feel the calling to defend reality on that subject.

First, the commenter made the point that:

regardless of what you believe, saying “prayer doesn’t work” is a very broad statement.

over 75% of Americans consider themselves to be some type of Christian. do you really consider the majority of Americans to believe in something that doesn’t work?

Yes, Michael, of course I call into question the validity of prayer, even if 75% of Americans believe in it. First, Americans represent a fairly small percentage of the Earth’s population, and whether or not this small percentage of the earth believes in the efficacity of prayer, that belief does not in any way prove that prayer works. Through the course of humanity, you could choose any of the things that the majority of humans believed in, but were proven wrong through science, or evolution of ethics: flat earth, slavery, evil witchcraft, astrology, earth as the center of the universe.

The simple fact is that when it comes to unproven belief, a majority of belief is not ever a proof of validity or reality. A majority of the Chinese population feels that Communism is valid, a majority of the Indian population thinks that Vishnu is a real god, a majority of Nazis thought that Jews were supposed to be wiped out. That does not mean that any of these were correct, as they were not supported by evidence of any kind. Volume of belief is not a proof of the validity of those beliefs.

Then, another commonly offered argument:

Huckabee himself said, “Throughout my life, I’ve found that there are sometimes three possible answers to our prayers–’Yes,’ ‘No,’ or ‘Not Now.’ I would like to think our prayers were answered with a ‘Not Now.’”

God is always there. how He works isn’t always immediately clear.

Believe it or not, Huck is not the first to propose those three answers. So, he thinks his prayers for the presidency were answered with a “Not now”. What if he never gains the Preidency? With the number of votes he got, it’s more than probable that it will never happen for him. Where does that leave his prayers? I’ve heard more than I like, “Th Lord helps those that help themselves”. Well, what about Mike, who busted his ass, was more than honest about his beliefs and how they would affect his presidency, and labored against overwhelming odds because his word was god’s word? Mike helped himself, held god’s word in his heart, and got nothing. What does that say about the validity of prayer?

It’s very easy to say that “god works in mysterious ways”, but that’s nothing more than a cop-out used to ignore failure despite prayer. So, what if Mike got the nomination? He and all of his followers would have credited god for his success, and all thought of his supporters, his campaign managers, and his donators would have went right out the window because he prayed for a win, and god delivered one.

So, you can see the double-edged sword of belief: if you get what you prayed for, the thanks is gods, no matter how much real work you put into it. If you didn’t get what you prayed for, the answer was “no” or “not yet”, despite  all the work you put into it. Therefore, the work you put into something you want has no effect on whether you get it or not, it’ all based on god’s whim.

Then, you have to take into account the importance of what you ask for, in the grand scheme of the world. For instance, there’s uncountable people in Africa dying of AIDS and starvation. What are the chances that none of them are praying to god for relief, for the lives of their family?  Slim to none, I would say. So, will AIDS and hunger be wiped out because of their heartfelt prayers and belief? Of course it won’t! It will take the hard work of their government and charity groups to help those poor, beleaguered people! Prayer will do nothing for them, but Mike Huckabee can pray for a government position and have the fucking hubris to think for even one second that his prayer will be answered in the affirmative?

No matter what you people pray for, there is always someone with a more worthy request, and that person has no more chance of having his/her prayers answered than you do. You have exactly the same chance of forgetting the prayer and having the desired results manifest as you do of spending all of your time praying for the desired result and having your desires manifest. The best part is that you have the out of “god works in mysterious ways” which allows you to forget god’s failures and concentrate on the times when your prayers are answered in the affirmative.

Show me, michael, some proof of an answered prayer, and this has to be far above and beyond the percentage of folks who believe prayer to be affective. Sorry, man, but that argument is weaker than anyone would care to admit